The Sittaford Mystery APA The Murder at Hazlemoor by Agatha Christie

Set in the winter in the wilds of Devonshire, this mystery doesn't have the usual suspects of Christie's detectives.  But it does have a very inventive beginning.  There's snow on the ground and more coming soon.  The Willetts, a mother and daughter who have rented Sittaford House for the winter from Captain Trevelyan, a retired navy man who only agreed to it because the money was good. He got himself a place to rent in Exhampton, six miles away.  The Willetts have invited the neighbors over for tea and company.  Major Burnaby, also retired, and a close friend of Trevelyan, is the first to arrive.  Then comes Mr. Rycoft, an amateur criminalist. And then Mr Garfield, a single young man, dancing attendance to his demanding aunt. And finally Mr Duke, a mysterious gentleman whom no one knows anything  They exchange pleasantries, and someone suggests playing table turning, which is an occult game where one knock equals "no" and two knocks equal "yes",  each knock starts off with the first letters of the alphabet: "a" is one knock, "b" is two knocks.    

At first, it's good fun, but it soon takes a turn when the "spirit" they are speaking to is Trevelyan's, and he is dead.  Everyone is upset after that, but Major Burnaby is the most upset and wonders if his best friend is okay.  He insists on leaving and walking to Trevellyan's rented house in Exhampton by himself.  When he finally gets there, he finds Trevelyan dead inside with a window open that a thief has apparently gotten in by.  The police believe that it is a burglar who thought the place was empty.  Inspector Narrcatt, the man brought in to investigate, does not believe this is the case.

Trevelyan has two nephews and a niece, as well as a sister who will inherit his vast estate.  Narrcatt arrests Jim Pearson, one of the nephews, when he finds out that Pearson had been in town that day and left early the next morning.  However, it seems too easy, and Pearson doesn't appear to be smart enough to have committed the crime.  Pearson's brother, who is supposed to be in Australia, has been sneaking around Sittaford House and the young Miss Willett.  The niece is married to a marginally selling writer who really needs the money.  Trevelyan's sister is married to a man who came back from The Great War paralyzed and in need of expensive treatment.  Trevellyan was not a particularly nice man.  He didn't like or trust women.  No one except Major Burnaby will truly miss him.  

The book really comes alive when Emily, the fiancée of Jim Pearson, comes down to investigate.  She is a beautiful, strong woman who can easily get men to do her bidding.   She works on her investigation and Narrcatt does his, but she makes sure to keep the Inspector informed of what she finds out.  This book was slow out of the gate, but it finishes with a real bang.  This is Agatha Christie at her best.  A perfect read for the winter months to come.

Quote

A real simple sailor at heart...Every woman loves a sailor.

Agatha Christie (Murder at Sittaford p 114)

Link to Amazon:  https://www.amazon.com/Sittaford-Christie-Mysteries-Collection-Paperback/dp/0062074148/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2E9T61PJXN8FF&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.sWd3rmUnPDK1_cpjfRBsz6kelf77T79C1xBTBlOHeG8iUvtlPDa9ygDWm1kOTYI2PTG1mNa_D5VBf-M3FlzyNrpJ8VgG2Z47EWx6nVu-sU_Lk5uOPAb2DAeEVdGXQsRvRV-HLWoagrBaONjqbc8H4sR_P8QqJ41MAkBv4SrCLR7coBKbWZ9dkfSgqz5iP-u9UgNKpfWatEmbtx-zva68KcezRjvJL021BEUZ5RUS3w4.n5RfC7T1-U6yfm9uvbiXw2L0nPTSgiswQRVumciEb0M&dib_tag=se&keywords=sittaford+mystery&qid=1766608399&sprefix=sittaford%2Caps%2C165&sr=8-1

Politically Correct Holiday Stories by James Finn Garner

Published in 1995, this book is the precursor to this age of "wokefullness".  It uses such words as: persun, womyn, womman, s/he, and herstory.  At the beginning of the book is an update of the poem "Twas the Night Before Christmas", called "'Twas the Night Before Solstice".  Some lines include: Or choosing a tree just to murder and stump it/ And dress it all up like a seasonal strumpet...I saw there below through the murk of the night/ A sleigh and eight reindeer of nonstandard height./ At the reins of that sleigh sat a mean-hearted knave/ Who treated each deer like his personal slave./ I'd seen him before in some ads for car loans,/ Plus fast food and soft drinks and cellular phones...His clothes were all covered with soot, but of course,/ From our wood-fueled alternative energy source./ Through the grime I distinguished the make of his duds--/ He was dressed all in fur, fairly dripping with blood.  The poem is delightfully funny in a new and fresh way.

Garner also adapts  Frosty the Persun of Snow, which is about the dangers of global warming, The Nutcracker, Rudolph the Nasally Empowered Reindeer, who is a union leader, and A Christmas Carol, which is the longest as it is separated into sections for the different ghosts.  The ebook version of this book has an extra two stories, "Santa's Ashes", a parody of "Angela's Ashes" that tells the story of Santa's ghetto childhood, "Jerry's Last Ride", which is a sweet Christmas story, and "Honk Honk, My Darling: A Rex Koko, Private Clown Mystery.  The book is only around a hundred pages, but it is worth reading as it pokes fun at a PC culture and rewrites beloved Christmas stories in a way that makes the holidays festive.

Quote

The happy childhood isn't much worth talking about. Worse than the ordinary miserable childhood is the miserable Irish childhood, and worse yet is the miserable Irish childhood at the North Pole.

James Finn Garner ("Santa's Ashes")

The hardcover book is priced at $13.99, and the Kindle edition is available for $2.99 on Amazon.

Amazon Link:https://www.amazon.com/Politically-Correct-Holiday-Stories-Storybook-ebook/dp/B004BA5EWE/ref=sr_1_2?crid=1TWYFWHB64SK0&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.hftwsykLwfX86lODfhBp4kObVissJe08zNOoZb3zrerjn3HrnbZ1mwgBP1q2QtQZTp3rjTQNHmcfq98Gvywg-rSbBHvvW4qGD1fjXN8kUKtw1UKQwk7yvGh3s3OGOpJhNbA4jgnMlZy9IWqQ3zb1w6QywJlBYWdsmVUQe_-r7yQe5X74idnzNSLOGfHlAAJu_9Ja8Ak2Wk9z3KM77L9WDysq23IYdkRnoJwTm8UobOw.RijhgyO5GYzQXgtGoUoUuco8alkPVsFsSZgwbYsMW4c&dib_tag=se&keywords=james+finn+garner&qid=1766416165&sprefix=james+finn+garner%2Caps%2C145&sr=8-2

 

This delightful Christmas mystery begins with Mother Anna, Father Oli, their fifteen-year-old son Ben, and their seven-year-old daughter Lily waking up on Christmas Eve after a party that left Anna with a hangover.   When Anna goes into her larder to get food for breakfast, she discovers Father Christmas stabbed to death on the floor.  Of course, it isn't the real Father Christmas, it's her boss Colin, who invited himself and insisted on being Santa so women would sit on his lap and give him a thrill.  He is a pretty sleazy guy.  But just no liking the guy is no real motive for murder; he would have been killed off a long time ago. Anna takes her family to Starbucks to avoid the dead body, but she tells Oli about it and goes back home to greet the police while Oli entertains the kids.  

A police constable, Simons, and a Detective Sergeant Bacon arrive on the scene, and they destroy the crime scene, including the footprint that Anna, thankfully, took pictures of.  The local police basically sent Laurel and Hardy; that's how incompetent the two are.  They are more interested in getting back to the station to enjoy the Christmas party being held.  Disheartened, Anna and her best friend Jennie decide to solve the mystery themselves, with the help of Oli.  While they are doing this, they must clean up the party mess and get ready for Oli's parents, who are due on Christmas Day.  His mother is a monster, the worst possible mother-in-law to Anna.  Nothing is ever good enough.

The first suspects to come to mind are Colin's long-suffering wife and their son Bruce, who will inherit the company owned by his dad.  Colin has a long-lost child from before he got married who has recently made contact.  Anna places everyone down on her list as a suspect, including her friend and her children.  There's also her brother Toby and his partner, who decided to set up a business selling doggie treats.  Colin agreed to invest, but he had thoughts of his own on how the business should be run.  

Ben is brought on board because it was hard keeping it a secret from him.  Ben suggests that they look at the film from their front door, Ringer. Using this device, they can eliminate many suspects from the list.  Will Anna solve the murder before her in-laws arrive?  This hilarious mystery takes you on a jaunty ride through murder at Christmas.  I highly recommend this novel, which is  $2.99 on Kindle.   

Quotes

No, Oli, I would think the baby did NOT sleep well. The baby is a demon baby from hell who I suspect is trying to drive me insane by waking at hourly intervals and then waiting until I have just drifted to sleep to start mewling like a possessed tiger cub.

Jo Middleton (Happy Bloody Christmas p 2)

It really is true that the teenage years begin at seven.

Jo Middleton (Happy Bloody Christmas P 3)

I wonder how many happy marriages are based on simmering resentment and petty acts of revenge.

Jo Middleton (Happy Bloody Christmas P6)

I've always found it funny that we spend so long when our kids are little trying to get them to sleep longer, spending our days in a half-zombie state from being woken at 5am to watch the same three favourite episodes of Paw Patrol and then when they finally start sleeping, so many parents seem desperate to wake them up again.

Jo Middleton (Happy Bloody Christmas, p. 22)

He doesn't know where we keep the pillowcases, he thinks washing up means dunking things in soapy water, and he snores like a congested walrus, but he lets me warm my cold feet on his hot legs in bed and he once booked the kids' appointmentsfor dental checkups completely unprompted, just because he knewtlhat it had been a year since they last went.

Jo Middleton (Happy Bloody Christmas P170-1)

For a dare?!? Who on earth has a wank in someone else's larder at a Christmas party FOR A DARE? I worry about you sometimes.

Jo Middleton (Happy Bloody Christmas P 190)

If I wasn't always asking myself what I was going to make for tea, perhaps I would have invented a groundbreaking technology by now, or come up with a cure for Alzheimer's. I swear, this is why a disproportionate number of important inventions and discoveries are made by men; it's because all the women are distracted by mental meal planning.

Jo Middleton (Happy Bloody Christmas P 195)

If you can't accuse your very favourite lifelong best friend of murder occasionally then seriously, who can you accuse?

Jo Middleton (Happy Bloody Christmas, pp. 232-3)

Someone really should make it much clearer to men that hearing things like “I've cleaned the toilets” is much more attractive than a six-pack or a head full of hair. Ask any woman, especiallya mother, about their preferred style of foreplay, and I bet plenty of them would say having my partner wash up without asking.

Jo Middleton (Happy Bloody Christmas P 256-7)

That was the Nineties for you, though. The bigger the twat, the bigger the crush. Not like nowadays, where it's all kindness and inclusivity. Did I tell you that Susie at work was telling me that there's a kid in her daughter's class that gets bullied for not being neurodiverse or having a diagnosed mental health condition?

Jo Middleton (Happy Bloody Christmas, pp. 299-300)

A very wise decision, a very wise decision indeed, as I am trained in the art of Feng Shui and I am not afraid to use it.

What are you going to do, asks Jennie, rearrange fer furniture to flow her into jail?

Jo Middleton (Happy Bloody Christmas, p. 315)

Link to Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Happy-Bloody-Christmas-author/dp/0008711100/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3G935T6YA9O6U&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.PaB6puqTR4DIRgi96lpFpp9YpusUzPg1viPOGnBFT4XGjHj071QN20LucGBJIEps.D06J4zikip1DWz_pD00qk1b0sbr1x2kC3I2MWSQCS6o&dib_tag=se&keywords=happy+bloody+christmas+by+jo+middleton&qid=1765984413&sprefix=Happy+Blo%2Caps%2C728&sr=8-1

The Worst Noel: Hellish Holiday Tales

This book of Holliday horror story essays are mostly funny in different ways and some are kind of sad in how bad it really was for that person.  Some of them are written by Jews who try to battle and survive Christmas and those that observe it.  In the first one, a family's car gets hit  by a deer on their way to spend their Christmas holidays.  The writer muses why Darwinism doesn't seem to have affected the deer population.  They have yet to learn to avoid roads and just jump on them willy-nilly.

In the story titled Blue Christmas: The Tour by John Marchese, he talks about some of the odd meeting of the family of girlfriends over the years but focuses on the one with his fiancée.  "First off, they were Texan, which calls off all bets on behavior.  Second, they were what is called a blended, with a stepmother and stepsister and stepbrother and other extended steps.  Third they were born again, which I took to mean that they would greet me at the front door, get a whiff of my Roman Catholic heathenism, and run panting for the Bible."  Her father and stepmother didn't drink, so he was forced to drink a hideous sherbert punch from hell.  They also were the first to arrive, since they got there on time and no one in that family ever does.  The next person to show up is forty-five minutes late.  By the time most of them have gotten there, it's been at least two hours before they finally eat.  Her step sister Vickie Dickey is on her third marriage, but he is considered a good catch because of his big truck and large knife.  After dinner, they stood around a birthday cake and sang Happy Birthday to Jesus.  But he realizes he will get used to them and thankfully it means not having to meet any more new families.

In Chapter Eight, Amy Krouse Rosenthal tells of her Jewish heritage.  She grew up in a family that didn't go to the temple, only observed Passover, and celebrated Christmas.  Then one year, her mother decides it's time to join the temple and not have Christmas.  Instead, they had a bush, a dreidel, chocolate coins, singing Herman The Hanukkah Candle to the tune of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, and a beautiful Menorah that was the highlight of the event.  One mother, who had never celebrated Hanukkah and decided to for the first time, had no idea how to do it.  She used a sponge as a Menorah and placed eight birthday candles and let them burn down to the sponge.  Catherine Newman who celebrates both holidays as her and her husband are of different religions, has to explain to her son that Santa is a bigot and doesn't send gifts to those religions who don't celebrate Christmas.  As a stocking gift, she had a snow globe made with a picture of them in Mexico.  When the boy sees it, it exclaims, "Santa followed us to Mexico."  And one Jewish grandmother had this to say about Jews celebrating Chrismas: "We celebrate Thanksgiving and we're not Pilgrims."

Joni Rogers chronicles when she stopped believing in Santa.  She was in second grade at the Mount Calvary Evangelical Elementary and the teacher has them spell out Santa.  Then she rearranges the letters to spell Satan.  "Then she went on to explain that Christmas was a lie invented by the Pope, who served the Father of All Lies, and anyone who believed in Santa was stealing baby Jesus's birthday."

Cintra Wilson has another view of Christmas.  There's the fictional perfect Christmas with the elaborate wreaths, great- grand- nonny's china, and precocious three-year-olds.  Then there's the poor lonely people's Christmas: "They spend X-mas in their lousy apartments lighting cigarettes off the space heater, unshaven and sniveling, wearing the clothes they slept in, drinking vodka straight out of the plastic handle jug, and watching the burning Yule Log on TV until it actually seems to have dialogue."  Her way of getting into the Yuletide spirit is to build gingerbread crack houses with frosting graffiti, make a sad snowman on your sidewalk and put a sign on it that says "I am a 56-year-old Vietnam Veteran with Hepatitis C Please Help, and placing crime scene tape around the nativity scene at a church and put a gun in Jesus's hand showing that he shot a wise man.

No matter how bad Christmas can get for you, there is always someone who has had a more rotten one than you and this book shows it in spades.  I can think back to some of my own unhappy Christmases and realize that they were nothing compared to the ones in this book.  This book will make you feel so much better about yourself and the holidays.

Link to Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Worst-Noel-Hellish-Holiday-Tales/dp/0060838116/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1480687583&sr=8-1&keywords=The+worst+noel

Bloodbane by Bellamy Barnes

 

I received this book as an advance copy from the author.  It goes on sale today.  It's been a while since I read a romantic fantasy, but from the first page, I was hooked on this guilty pleasure.  It's set in a small town in Alaska.  One day, a sheriff's deputy, Ruby Evans, is attacked and found in her truck.  Underneath her truck is the body of Grayson, a vampire.  To the side are the two men he killed.  Grayson gets put in jail, his body a bit charred.  Ruby receives medical attention, but can't remember what happened.  Grayson isn't talking.  He thinks the less she knows about the supernatural world, the better she will be.  Ruby tries to get him to tell her, and soon finds herself attracted to him.

The other deputy, Cooper, doesn't trust Grayson as far as he can throw him.  Ruby tries to convince Grayson to receive medical treatment from Milo, the local doctor and ME, but Grayson won't hear of it.  He knows only blood can help him now.  The deputies discover that the two men are part of a large group that lives near the forest.  Run by Thayne, who is the Alpha of a werewolf clan, the two men who were killed weren't much liked by the clan and were constantly getting drunk and causing lots of trouble for the clan.  

When Ruby goes to do a death notification, she meets Thayne and feels an instant attraction to him.  I know what you are thinking: Twilight again with Team Grayson and Team Thayne.  But that is far from the truth. For one thing, this book is much more adult in theme and language.  Thayne can't have her because if he had sex with her, he'd kill her.  He can only mate with an Omega, the female equivalent of the Alpha.  Grayson doesn't want to have sex with her because sex and drinking blood are mixed inside of him, and he is afraid of draining her dry or turning her.  So everyone is pretty much suffering in silence.  

There is a survivor of the vampire's attack on the two men.  His name is Pretorias, and before being told to go cool off in his bunk, he tries to kill Ruby.  He leaves, taking half of the clan, and Pretorias won't be gone long. He plans on returning to attack the rest of the clan.   Grayson and Thayne decide Ruby needs to know, seeing as she has become a target of something new coming to light.  A vampire and a werewolf are natural enemies, but these two come together to protect the rest of the clan and Ruby.  You have to wait a long time for the sex scene to happen in this book, but it is so worth the wait.  I thoroughly enjoyed this book and look forward to reading more by this author.

Link To Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Bloodbane-Bellamy-Barnes-ebook/dp/B0FXY16S93/ref=sr_1_1?crid=Q2Q5RPD60ZXE&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.USSCNd2Yg9s166oQ4Mtl0cdF438KiK_Bk3gO1h3ciGQ.mRZv_uBGt2RBXJfRoKGZ5NpjGiHnluDmPNq5rnQonkw&dib_tag=se&keywords=bloodbane+bellamy&qid=1765559748&sprefix=bloodbane%2Caps%2C143&sr=8-1

Quotes

The strange feeling grated at the back of my mind like an itch I shouldn't have and cannot reach.

Bellamy Barnes (Bloodbane p 17)

It always sucks to feel like hell but not look it.

Bellamy Barnes (Bloodbane p17)

Who knew you were meant to stretch before moving corpses?

Bellamy Barnes  (Bloodbane p41)

I've long since learned things aren't always black and white, but I'm getting sick of living my life in fifty shades of maybe.

Bellamy Barnes (Bloodbane p 143)

The cost of breathing is a pound of flesh.

Bellamy Barnes  (Bloodbane p146)

Come on, guys! Not in front of the corpses!

Bellamy Barnes (Bloodbane p324)

Katabatic Circus Volume 2

This is the first time I have ever reviewed a book of poetry.  But a friend recommended it, and I decided to give it a try.  This is a collection of speculative poems.  Some of the poems I really liked, and some I did not understand or found boring.  In the "like" column, there is "No Matter What Shade or Shape of Darkness" by Kurt Newton.  The poem wonders if the lights never came back on and we lived in total darkness, what would that be like?  The lines, "I would become one with the night.  I'd /pull down the stars and wear them like/ a negligee." were rather evocotive, magical, and romantic.  Later, he talks about how if that person were the stars, he would be the moon caught in a maelstrom, crashing into them.  Another poem I liked was "Unanswered Prayer" by H.V. Patterson, which tells the story of a mother with "laundry-scented hands tremble/ around her cooling tea," while she prays for the safety of her son who is off fighting a war.  Sadness, with a little dash of hope, pours out of this poem as she prays to never get that knock on the door with the worst news of her life.  By the same author, "Resurrection Plant: Selaginella lepidophylla," this poem is about being born anew.  How "your hands were the gentle rain/ your lips the softening soil/ your voice the spirit which/ breathed into me/ and called me back to myself."  

Pixie Bruner wrote five great poems.  The first, "The Kaboom," brings to mind Robert Frost's poem, "Fire and Ice."  "You were awaiting,/ like Marvin the Martian,/ an Earth-shattering 'kaboom'./There is not even a satisfying 'boom'/ 'smash' 'crash' or explosion./ Instead, there is merely a disappointing sizzle." The other three form the Dreamfruit Series.  Dreamfruit is another name for our nightly dreams.  In the first poem of the series, we are harvesting the dreamfruit, "...making soporifics and potions./ Made into lozenges and communion wafers/ to dissolve underneath eager tongues of the wordsmiths, the lost, and the dreamless."   However, "Timing is essential./ A day too late, they become grenades./ Seeds become steel shrapnel." Three more poems deal with Lilth and the Dreamfruit, packaging the Dreamfruit, and the overconsumption of the Dreamfruit.  

I really didn't understand "Scoring Performance 9" by Regolith Crosser, CA, 32,000,000 Hours Past Michael Hessel-Mial.  It starts with a "Not found" error, then goes to lines that talk about a singer and a "Limb and Payload game". It seemed like so much convoluted nonsense.  It just drones on, line after line that don't reveal a storyline, message, or anything that makes sense.  I also found that David Huntington's poem "A Briefing From Command" goes on a bit too long.  I also liked the poetry of Ariya Brandy, C.M. Ellis, especially Elpis, and Ace Boggess. Overall, it is a good book and worth taking a look at.

Link to Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=katabatic+circus+volume+2&crid=35FJ892VAZ7FO&sprefix=katabatic+circus%2Caps%2C117&ref=nb_sb_ss_p13n-expert-pd-ops-ranker_2_16

My True Love Gave To Me: Twelve Holiday Stories edited by Stephanie Perkins

This book includes stories by Holly Black, Ally Carter, Matt De La Pena, Gayle Forman, Jenny Han, David Levithan, Kelly Link, Myra McEntire, Rainbow Rowell, Laini Taylor, and Kiersten White.  It gets off to a rocky start with "The Lady and the Fox" by Kelly Link whose magic it attempts to conjure never quite gets there.  And "Angels in the Snow" by Matt De La Pena which is just plain boring as is "Polaris Is Where You'll Find Me" by Jenny Han.  I was beginning to wonder if this was a book worth reading.

Then I read "Your Temporary Santa" by David Levithan and the book really took off for me.  In this book a guy's boyfriend asks him to dress as Santa for his little sister who still believes. His other sister who is older not only doesn't believe, but is pissed off when she finds him in the suit because someone else used to wear the suit and he isn't worthy.  He decides to go visit his boyfriend's room for comfort. Does he find it?

"Kramerrpsulauf" by Holly Black explores the dark side of Christmas and actually punishing those who deserve it.  At a Krampsulauf festival in their town that is tame compared to the actual festival, Hanna and her friends Wren and Penny run into Penny's boyfriend who appears to be with his girlfriend there.  Wren invites the girl and her friends to a party at Hanna's dead grandmother's trailer.  Hanna wants it to be a fancy party with champagne and quiches.  But Wren texts the girl and finds that Ross told them the party was canceled.  Wren told her that she was the other woman and Wren could prove it.  Ross wrecks the party table ruining Hanna's party when suddenly the Krampus that she met at the festival shows up with two others wanting to punish Ross.  What will Hanna, Penny, and the other girl choose to do?  When the Krampus that she invited to the party asks Hanna what she wants what will she choose?

In "What the Hell Have You Done Sophie Roth?" by Gayle Forman, Sophie Roth is constantly asking herself that question her first semester at Bumbfuck University.  She is considered "Big City" which to her sounds like another word for Jewish or someone who likes foreign films and are sarcastic.  She runs into a black guy who is also "Big City" named Russell at a Christmas concert outdoors.  She says something about it being Ned Flanders like and he hears it and the two decide to go for a ride to a diner he knows about that serves the perfect pie.  He remembers that it's the last day of Hanukkah and orders her some hash browns, applesauce, and sour cream.  When they leave they go in search of candles to celebrate using her Menorah.

Quotes

It turns out, teachers think of glitter as the herpes of the craft world---impossible to contain or exterminate.

           -Myra McEntire "Beer Buckets and Baby Jesus" (My True Love Gave to Me:Twelve Holiday               Stories) p 203

It’s hard not to feel just a little bit fat when your boyfriend asks you to be Santa Claus. “But I’m Jewish?” I protest. “It would be one thing if you were asking  me to be Jesus—he, at least was a member  of my tribe, and looks good in a Speedo. Plus,  Santa requires you to be jolly , whereas Jesus only requires you to be born.”
-Davis Levithan “Yoir Temporally Santa” (My True Love Gave to Me;12 Holiday Stories) p 133

Tomorrow would be different. Sophie understood that. There really was no such thing as a minor miracle.
- Gayle Forman “What the hell have you done Sophie Roth?” (My True Love Gavel to Me:12 Holiday Stories) p151



Listed On Amazon:https://www.amazon.com/My-True-Love-Gave-Me/dp/1250059313/ref=sr_1_1?crid=3ER6E63TZREHO&keywords=my+true+love+gave+to+me+twelve+holiday+stories&qid=1577302925&s=books&sprefix=my+true+l%2Ctoys-and-games%2C267&sr=1-1

Thief of Night by Holly Black

 

Holly Black is a bestselling author of juvenile and young adult fiction, including The Spiderwick Chronicles, The Curse Workers trilogy, and her Fey Series.  This is her first book aimed at adults. She got the idea for the book from Hans Christian Andersen's story "The Shadow," which is about a scholar who gives his shadow more and more power until it leaves him and leads to a more successful life than his own.  In Holly Black's new magical world, alterests sew shadows on and fit them properly, gloamists who let loose their shadows to do things for them, and puppeteers who control other people's shadows.  In this world, we meet Charlie Hall, a young woman who was a thief who sold antique books on shadow work to interested buyers.  She lives with her younger sister, Posey, who does tarot card readings, and her boyfriend, Vince, who does crime scene clean-up.  Charlie works as a bartender.  Vince didn't have a shadow, but Charlie felt it wasn't something she could ask about. After all, she was lying about her past as a thief.

Charlie got started early on pulling scams.  The family slogan was "Hole in the head. Hole in the heart. Hole in the pocket."  Her mother has attached herself to a real bad guy, so Charlie pretends she can take on the spirit of a long-dead entity named Alonso, who offers her advice.  When she tries this on her mother's next boyfriend, Rand, he sees through it and begins taking Charlie to gigs that he has set up to scam money from well-off clients.  But everything goes pear-shaped when Rand sets them up for an evening with Lionel Salt, a puppeteer who is very wealthy and powerful.  Charlie barely gets out alive.  She vows vengeance upon Salt, and that time seems to be here when she's working at the bar. Paul Ecco comes in looking to sell The Premium Nocture, also known as the Book of Blights.  A blight is a shadow that can act independently and is no longer connected to its host.  The book belonged to Salt, and he said that his grandson stole it. He is willing to pay a lot of money to get it back.  

On her way back home from the bar that night, she finds Ecco's shredded body, and someone has stolen the pages he had from the book.  Because of this, Vince insists on taking her to and from work to the bar.  Not long after that, a gloamist enters the bar looking for the book and for the person who found Ecco.  He tries to shred Charlie, but Vince arrives just then and kills the gloamist.  He has killed for Charlie and is cleaning up the evidence.  Now Charlie is wondering about Vince and how he has no shadow, and how easy it is to kill the gloamist.  She has no idea who she has been with all this time.  The two wind up getting into an argument and breaking up, which she regrets, but can't find him to try to fix.  On top of that, while trying to help a friend with her boyfriend, who has disappeared, possibly with another woman, she finds herself in even more trouble.

This is a helluva first adult-level book for Black.  The world she has created is amazing, interesting, and fairly unique.  To me, Charlie is a very relatable woman who has bad luck with men and with money.   She tries to do right by her sister and get her into college so she can do something with her life, but she fails.  Her sister has no interest in college and wants to become a gloamist. She spends all her spare time chasing rumors and stories on how to become one.  She can't believe her luck with Vince, who seems like a nice guy, but as usual, she is disappointed.  I cannot recommend this book highly enough.  It does end on a cliffhanger; however, the sequel was just released and is entitled Thief of Night.  

Quotes

The past is the only thing that matters.
Holly Black (Book of Night p82)

It was hard to fault Vince, though whatever his secrets were, she could still count on him. He was currently getting rid of a body for her. You couldn’t get more dependable than that.

Holly Black (Book of Night p80)

Curious as a cat on crack.
Holly Black (Book of Night p50)

A small smile lifted one corner of his mouth, and she felt a swell of strange, bittersweet longing for someone who was already hers.

Holly Black (Book of Night p43)

If she was going to get murdered, she’d like to do it in Paris. Or Tokyo.

Holly Black (Book of Night p39)

Maybe she needed something different. A nicotine patch of a man. Something to draw off her worst impulses at least for one night.

Holly Black (Book of Night p36)

Charlie Hall, imp of the perverse. Appreciated a relationship for being simple and still tempted to see if she could make a complicated mess of it.

Holly Black (Book of Night p30)

No one remembers the language they took in high school.

Holly Black (Book of Night p29)

A small smile lifted the corners of his mouth, and she felt a swell of strange, bittersweet longing for someone who was already hers.

Holly Black (Thief of Night p3)

The rich believed they were lucky, and that any good fortune they didn't already have could be bought. They had so much already, disappointment became inevitable.

Holly Black (Book of Night p95)

Charlie swore that one day she was going to go back to Salt's mansion and get revenge on those f***ers. But she only swore it to herself, so there would be no one else to let down when she didn't..

Holly Black (Book of Night p103)

There are lots of different kinds of lies. Fibs to lubricate society. Deceptions to avoid consequences. Misrepresentation to hide behind, because what you've done is bad and you're ashamed of it. And then there are the lies you tell because everything about you is a lie.

Holly Black (The Book of Night p103)

You could steal breath from a body, hate from a heart, the moon from the sky,

Holly Black (The Book of Night p107)

The truth was often complicated and very hard to explain.

Holly Black (The Book of Night p110

It was a childish desire, a wish for the world not to be as it was, for people to act in ways they just didn't.

Holly Black (The Book of Night P136)

Hole in the head, hole in the heart, hole in the pocket. The Hall Family curse.

Holly Black (The Book of Night P136)

Not only was there something so deeply wrong with her that the guy she'd been sure was a good person turned out to be a murderer who faked his own death and also the grandson of a person she hated, but even that guy left her.

Holly Black (The Book of Night p139)

Charlie wanted everyone to think of her as hardheaded and hardhearted. Hard as old petrified wood, as rocks, as candy that cracks your teeth. But she wasn't.

Holly Black (The Book of Night p146)

Oh, and this time she really would make him pay, for the past, for the gun he had on her, but most of all for sending Hermes and wrecking a perfectly good relationship built on perfectly good lies.

Holly Black (The Book of Night P163)

I wish I could say that I was sorry. That I wanted to be honest the whole time, but I didn't; I never wanted what I told you to be true.

Holly Black (The Book of Night P212)

It made her a little giddy to think of having another fight with him. It made her want to put on lipstick.

Holly Black (The Book of Night P235)

Love was a family religion, passed done to her when she'd been to young to protect herself from belief.

Holly Black (The Book of Night p265)

Holidays on Ice by David Sedaris

In this now Christmas classic, North Carolina writer, David Sedaris, has written a book of hilarious essays mostly about this holiday, but also includes one on Halloween and one on Easter (in France they don't believe in the Easter Bunny, they believe in the chocolate bell.  And I thought the Easter Bunny was a weird idea).  These essays include his time as a Macy store Elf, the worst Christmas letter/card ever, Christmas plays, two families that do the utmost to outdo each other during the holidays, Dinah the Christmas Whore, and the Dutch version of Santa Claus.

During his time at Macy's as an elf, sometimes it was a hellish job, but he always made it fun by doing things his way.  There are many stations at the wonderland area where the different Santas are (some people get ticked off when they get the "wrong" Santa, be it the black one, the tan one, or the white one).  At one such location, the elf is supposed to encourage people over to get their first view of Santa Claus.  This got old quick, so he started naming celebrities and people would run over to see, only to be disappointed.  However, there were a fair share of celebrities who would come in with their families and he would let the rest of the parents know so they could get a look.

There was one Santa who really believed he was Santa Claus and one Santa that was so loveable and made the experienced so magical that parents would break down in tears.  One bad Santa would make him sing the child's favorite Christmas song.  At his breaking point, he was forced to sing Away in a Manger, so he sang it in Billie Holliday style.  That Santa was more cautious of him from then on.  At the film station, they would unfortunately, have to tell people, if it was late in December, that their photos wouldn't come in until January.  But this was before the digital age when you can now get instant pictures.  Many parents weren't interested in what, if anything, their child had to say on his lap.  But one mom coaxed her son into saying that he wanted Proctor and Gamble to stop animal testing.  Though he never did this job again, it was quite an experience.

In the Christmas card/letter, a woman is trying to put a smile on the awful year she has had.  Her husband's love child from his years in Vietnam appears on his doorstep, a twenty-two-year-old girl who wears a lot of makeup and barely anything else.  She claims not to understand you when you try to get her to help around the house.  Then there's her daughter who married a loser and had a baby with him.  When things go south and her daughter goes into rehab, she takes in the crack baby to raise.  When she leaves to go shopping for a few hours to buy the Christmas gifts she has yet to get, she leaves the baby in the incapable hands of Kheh San and bad things happen.  Her court hearing is after Christmas and she hopes that her friends can come and be character witnesses.

The Dutch version of Santa Claus arrives by boat and horse in November to spend a few weeks there asking people what they want.  He is accompanied by six to eight black men, who were at one time considered his slaves but are now considered his helpers.  If the child was bad, Santa would beat him, kick him, and take him to Spain.  If they were good, they would receive toys in their shoes.

I really loved these stories,and I can't wait to read his other books.  These were hilarious essays and made me really get into the holiday spirit.  This is a must read for those this Christmas.

Link to Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Holidays-Ice-David-Sedaris/dp/0316078913/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1479662897&sr=1-1&keywords=holidays+on+ice

A Dark Hole Darkly by Drew Melbourne

 

https://www.amazon.com/Dark-Hole-Darkly-Drew-Melbourne-ebook

Patrick hasn't been very motivated about life.  Then his mother is found murdered in her apartment with no pants on.  They hadn't exactly been in contact for the last two years, and he feels that he owes it to her to solve her murder.  His ever-patient girlfriend Lilly supports him in this endeavour.  Patrick starts keeping a journal with chapters that track his progress.  He writes in big letters CLUES and underneath that he has: blunt force trauma, forced entry, no pants, and voicemail: "I've been thinking a lot about Regulus".

Regulus was an old science fiction show on TV from 1983 to 1987 (think Star Trek or Doctor Who, but with a much smaller budget).  His mother has been obsessed with that show for decades, only backing off recently.  She was the head of the fan club, wrote the newsletter with a friend named Marvin, and wrote a song to the tune of "Pianoman" about the show, which is sung at their conventions. According to the Wikipedia page, the show is about five criminals who wake up on a prison transport and discover they are heading to the sun Regullus.  They find a ship named the Regullus in orbit, and they get on and discover their own skeletons. It's a time-loop show where they go back in time to save themselves, only to die in the process.  British actor Roland Yates is the star.  Patrick's mother inherited his cricket bat when he died. Which pissed off Marvin, who said that Yates had promised him the bat. That basically broke the friendship between Marvin's and Patrick's mothers.

Lily and Patrick go to the yearly convention for Regulus and meet a true cast of characters, any of whom may be the killer.  Patrick goes on an adventure of a lifetime where he learns more about his mother than he ever knew. This is a wickedly smartly written book. Patrick has so much depth to him.  I really loved this book and its dark humor. The quotes that I list will show you what I mean.  I really can't recommend this book enough. 

Quotes

When you get to my age, Patty, it’s not a question of if you’re going to die, but how spectacularly you can go out.

Drew Melbourne (A Dark Hole Darkly ch47)

“When people zink of zer ADHD,” he said,”a picture in zer head is often ze rambunctious boy who terrorizes ze zird-grade classrooms. Who pulls ze pigtails. Runs with ze scissors. Eats ze glue.”

“That’s not me,” I said. “I hate trying new foods.”

Drew Melbourne (A Dark Hole Darkly ch 45)

First you haffta find a doctor who’s qualified to diagnose you. Who’ll take your insurance. Who has appointments open before the next ice age. Do the assessment. Wait. Get the results. And after that you might haffta find a whole other doctor to prescribe medication. The right dosage. Trial and error.

Drew Melbourne (A Dark Hole Darkly ch 48)

Believing in someone is not the same as believing that they should do stupid shit. Believing in someone means believing that they’ll stop doing stupid shit eventually.

Drew Melbourne (A Dark Hole Darkly ch 23)

And anyway, every drug store I’ve ever been to is basically the same store. Just rearranged to confuse me.

Drew Melbourne (A Dark Hole Darkly ch 22)

It’s funny how they treat her. Like an old friend who’s also their God who’s also sometimes invisible.

Drew Melbourne (A Dark Hole Darkly ch16)

The actual words I was using weren’t important. I was just stalling until Lilly's inner prudence kicked in. It was like Lilly’s Prime Directive: Always pee first.

Drew Melbourne (A Dark Hole Darkly ch 13)

Honestly, how can anybody time their arrival down to the minute? On New York trains? As far as I’m concerned, just arriving is a victory.

Drew Melbourne (A Dark Hole Darkly ch 6)

It’d been so long, I wondered whether I’d forgotten.

Drew Melbourne (A Dark Hole Darkly ch 2)

Sat down next to him on the floor by the recliner, because tables and chairs are just surfaces to to things on.

Drew Melbourne (A Dark Hole Darkly ch35)

My life is just failing until I get lucky.

Drew Melbourne (A Dark Hole Darkly ch48)

I didn't need luck, though. I had science.

Drew Melbourne (A Dark Hole Darkly ch52)

Guy answered the door. Grumbly. Messy hair. Hadn't shaved. T-shirt had holes in it. Still in his boxers and apparently fine with that. I get it. Life's a lot.

Drew Melbourne (A Dark Hole Darkly p227)

     

Five Fortunes by Barbara Venkataraman

A group of friends decided to used the mechanical fortune teller.  Rhianna has a sister and she helps her father run his store.  Her mother is dead and things have been really bad.  She doesn't get to hang out with her friends and money is tight.  So when she gets the fortune "You will soon come into money", she shrugs it off but knows that this would be a boon for her family.  

The only thing Lori seems to have in common with her mother these days is their shared love of dogs and helping out at the animal shelter.  She has two younger brothers that are a pain in the neck that she has to babysit them from time to time, keeping her from her friends.  Her fortune was "Jealousy is the green-eyed monster".  Who does she envy? And how will this affect her friendships?  

Twins Abby, the fashion influencer, and Alison, who gets excellent grades, are exact opposites.  Abby often convinces Alison to write her papers because she is too busy making videos for her online fashion advice site.  Their mother has a job that takes her overseas a lot for months at a time.  Alison got a fortune that said "Expect the unexpected" which was already her motto. Abby's fortune is "Your wisdom will shine a light", which is odd since Abby does poorly at school without Alison's help.  But Abby sees it as her giving her wisdom to those out there who are fashion handicapped.

Megan, gets the fortune "Beware of false friends".  The girls were all supposed to meet at the Underground Coffeehaus for drinks.  Megan is the only one to show.  The others couldn't make it but forgot to text her.  Megan begins to wonder if her fortune has come true, when she meets a goth girl who calls her Cheerleader Barbie and who Megan calls Vampire Barbie.  Megan feels as though she had lost her friends, but finds that she may have just made a new one.

I think young adults will really like this book about teen girls who have their own problems but have each other to lean on. This would be an excellent book for middle schoolers.  It isn't very long and maybe could have been longer to give it some time to really delve into these girls lives.  I enjoyed this book about a group of girlfriends who take their fortunes and decide to make their own luck.      

     

 Quotes

My life stinks so bad it should be a Lifetime movie.

Barbara Venkataraman (Five Fortunes ch 14)

To him, silence was a sad balloon waiting to be filled with air.

Barbara Venkataraman ( Five Fortunes p22)

Riddle me this, Batman, don't we all hide behind different personas?

Barbara Venkataraman (Five Fortunes p 73)

Everything looks worse at three o’clock in the morning.

Barbara Venkataraman (Five Fortunes p22)

200 Greatest 70s Rock Songs: The Stories Behind the Music by Frank Mastropolo

 

This is a cool book that looks behind the scenes of some of the best rock songs of the 1970s.  Its like having a backstage pass to the best artists of that time.  Explore the secrets of these songs from how they came to be to where the inspiration came from   

The music for The Rolling Stones song "Brown Sugar" was written in a large field in Australia while Mick Jagger was filming the movie Ned Kelly.  He had messed up his hand and was trying to rehabilitate it.  He took a brand new kind of electric guitar and took it into the Outback and came up with the music.  The song was recorded at Alabama's Muscle Shoals studio.  It took him 45 minutes to write three sheets of lyrics.  Because of a dispute with their manager, the song was not released until the album Sticky Fingers.  However they first debuted it at the famous concert at Altamont. The song covers such controversial topics like drugs, rape, slavery, and interracial sex. Mick said in an interview that "God knows what I'm on about in that song.  It's such a mishmash.  All the nasty subjects in one go.  I never would write that song today.  I can't just write raw like that."

"Can't You See" by South Carolina's Marshall Tucker Band was not a hit and Marshall Tucker wasn't even in the band.  He was a piano tuner who worked in the practice space of the band.  Then Waylon Jennings did a cover of the song that only charted to 75 for the band, but charted high on the country charts.  Hank Jr., Alabama, and about 40 different bands have done a cover of the song.  You can still hear it on the radio 54 years later. It has become a Southern classic.

 "Heart of Glass" was written by Debbie Harry and guitarist Chris Stein and was a number one hit for Blondie in 1979. It was written in 1974 but the band had a hard time figuring out how it should go.  The tried it as a ballad and as a reggae song, but nothing seemed to work.  In 1978 they got producer Mike Chapman asked Harry what was influencing her at the moment and she replied Donner Summer.  The band had just gotten a Roland drum machine and were playing around with it.  Using a computerized was unusual for a guitar band.  People got mad at them for "going disco".  Clem Burke, the drummer refused to play it at first, until it became a hit and he was then forced to.  The lyrics weren't about anyone particular, just lost love.   For a while they played it with the chorus going "Once I had love and it was a gas.  Soon turned out it was a pain in the ass."  It was too repetitive so they changed it to "had a heart of glass."  The BBC bleeped out the one "ass" they kept in the song.  

This book also includes the stories behind such songs as: It Don't Come Easy, Hotel California, I'll Take You There, I Wanna Be Sedated, London Calling, and Long Train Running.  Mastropolo also included sections on singers and musicians who made the songs come alive, like Bobby Whitlock, the keyboard player , for Derek and the Dominoes and Harry Wayne "KC" Casey and the Sunshine Band.  It crosses many different genres of music and is incredibly interesting and informative.

Quotes

Kind of like a cross between a housewife and an evangelical preacher, is kind of what I do.

Iggy Pop

I don’t like the Eagles. There’re about as exciting as watching paint dry. Their albums are good for keeping the dust off your turntable and that’s about all.

John Wait

Having Our Say: The Delany Sisters' First 100 Years by Sarah and Al Elizabeth Delany and Amy Hill Hearth

 Bessie, age 101, and Sadie, aged 103 are doing a lot more than just having their say.  They are witnesses to the history of blacks in America in the 20th century.  Their father was born into slavery and grew up to become a minister in the Episcopalian church.  He believed in education for both the boys and the girls of his large family.  He settled in Raleigh, North Carolina with his wife and raised a family.  

Bessie, or "Queen Bess", who was the feisty one and "Sweet Sadie", who was the quiet, yet determined one lived together their whole lives.  They talk about growing up in the South and about getting their education.  Bessie in dentistry and Sadie in education.  Bessie became the second black woman to get a license in both New York and North Carolina.  Sadie became a superintendent of schools for New York City.  For Bessie being a woman and black meant that people would steal the dental tools that she had borrowed from her brother and no one did anything about it.  She had a rough time of it.  Sadie started out teaching Home Economics and therefore had a slightly easier time as a woman but not a black woman.

They moved from Raleigh to New York City to go to Columbia University.  They lived in Harlem and saw the Harlem Renaissance unfold before their eyes.  They met people like Book T. Washington, W.E.B Du Bois, Cab Calloway, and Lena Horne.  They also lived through two World Wars and the Civil Rights Movement.  It is also about the rise of the black middle class. This is a fascinating book that takes you through the pages of history by people who lived it.  

Quotes

Sister Sadie, we bought a house with windows, those windows are here for a reason and I'm going to use them! (Having Our Say: The Delany Sisters First 100 Years by Sadie and A Elizabeth Delancy and Amy Hill Hearth p 14)

You see, when you are colored, everyone is always looking for your faults. If you are going to make it you have to be entirely honest, clean, and brilliant.  Because if you slip up once, the white folks say to each other, "See, what'd I tell you"  So you don't have to be as good as white people you have to be better or the best.  When negroes are average, they fail, unless they are very, very lucky. Now, if you're average and white, honey, you can go far.  Just look at Dan Quale.  If that boy was colored he'd be washing dishes somewhere. (Having Our Say by Sadie and A. Elizabeth Delancy and Amy Hill Hearth p 114)

You see, when you are colored, everyone is always looking for your faults. If you are going to make it you have to be entirely honest, clean, and brilliant.  Because if you slip up once, the white folks say to each other, "See, what'd I tell you"  So you don't have to be as good as white people you have to be better or the best.  When negroes are average, they fail, unless they are very, very lucky. Now, if you're average and white, honey, you can go far.  Just look at Dan Quale.  If that boy was colored he'd be washing dishes somewhere. (Having Our Say by Sadie and A. Elizabeth Delancy and Amy Hill Hearth p 114)

I Was a Teenage Slasher by Stephen Graham Jones

 

Stephen Graham Jones has written another New York Times bestselling book that takes place in Lamesa, Texas and Tolly Driver who is looking back on the summer of 1989 when he was seventeen. Tolly's dad had died a year before in a car accident. He only has his mother who owns a hardware store and his best friend from school, Amber Dennison, the only Native living in town`.  Amber drives a Rabbit truck that runs on diesel.  The two are very close but not in a romantic way.  They are not in the marching band or the Future Farmers of America which puts them on the outside looking in. 

Tolly likes to go to parties and get drunk, throw up and make a fool of himself.  For the most part the other students ignore him because he no longer has a father.  Stace Goodkin is one of those people who gets great grades and follows the rules.  One night, the In Crowd decides to show Justin Joss a lesson in why he would never be a part of their crowd by taking him to a oil pump horse, one of those machines that bobs up and down like a bronco horse.  They convinced him to climb on top and ride.  Justin ended up mutilated by the machine.  Stace tried to help him, but only managed to distract Justin into causing more damage to himself.

The In Crowd throws a party one night and Tolly, as usual, is plastered.  He got the brilliant idea to do a cannonball in the pool getting everyone nearby soaking wet.  One of them was a baton twirler in the marching band named Shannon who is sitting at a table flirting with a cute older guy.  Tolly has a severe allergy to peanuts, so Shannon's date who puts peanuts in his Coke makes Tolly drink it.  He has a major reaction and his EpiPen is in Amber's car.  The band members take their belts off their uniforms and tie Tolly to a lounge chair.  He starts throwing up to try to get rid of the peanuts.  

Amber and Stace are talking inside the house when Stace sees into the backyard Tolly convulsing on the lounge chair.  Stace, a gymnast, vaults into action to get his EpiPen to him.  She injects him and her and Amber start trying to get him out of the restraints.  Suddenly, the dead Justin Joss appears with a chainsaw and begins to kill those at the party who were responsible for his death.  Even Stace is included in this because she was there.  He doesn't kill her, but hurts her really bad.  Stace had called her doctor father to help Tolly so he's coming and the police likely are too.  There's also Justin to contend with so, everyone runs off.  

Unfortunately, Tolly gets a splash of Justin's blood on his forehead.  When he wipes it away, it goes into an open wound on his forehead.  This will cause Tolly to go psycho and start his own killing spree.   And while the Tolly looking back hasn't killed anyone since, he's recounting this to explain how he became a psycho for a while.  This is a sharp book that nails high school life and living in West Texas on the head.  Its also the perfect book for today, Halloween.

Quotes

Amber...leaned against the steering wheel to shove her own hand down under the front of he seat, closing her eyes to let her fingers see better. (Stephen Graham Jones I Was a Teenage Slasher p7)

You think big thoughts when you're seventeen. Big stupid thoughts. (Stephen Graham Jones I Was a Teenage Slasher p9)

My kind don't exactly do  funerals.  I know.  We're the reason for the funeral. Stephen Graham Jones I Was a Teenage Slasher (p25)

Make enough of an ass of yourself, you get noticed, right? (Stephen Graham Jones I Was a Teenage Slasher p22)

Still? I'd just lost my dada year ago, hadn't I?  This--me being an idiot--was probably some stage of grief. (Stephen Graham Jones I Was a Teenage Slasher p28)

Someone not necessarily full of promise, but full of promises. Stephen Graham Jones I Was a Teenage Slasher (p66)

His two big sayings that year, both of which applied that night, were that nothing good happens after midnight, and that the grass really wasn't that much greener on the other side of fifty-five miles per hour.  Though it could get bloodier real damn fast. (Stephen Graham Jones I Was a Teenage Slasher p64-5)

Its less about survival, more about who you're holding when that big irradiated shock wave blows you to ash. (Stephen Graham Jones I Was a Teenage Slasher p66)

The world's so much simpler when you've got a chainsaw in your hand, isn't it? A chainsaw, or a machete or an axe, that's the elegant solution to every problem. (Stephen Graham Jones I Was a Teenage Slasher p67)

You always want your mom when you're hurt. When you call you're dad is when you've done something he can maybe be proud of. For pain, though, it's moms all the way. Stephen Graham Jones I Was a Teenage Slasher (p128)

We all want to hide, don't we?  To not have to be constantly navigating between our true selves and people's expectations twenty-four seven. (Stephen Graham Jones I Was a Teenage Slasher p136)